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A Message for Every Father

 

Let’s face it. A father needs big shoulders. Many responsibilities...pressures...demands. Most men I know seem genetically wired with a tremendous sense of responsibility for protecting and providing for their families. 

Are you a dad? Then I’ll bet you know what I mean.

The day to day pressures of life can seem overwhelming. The tyranny of the urgent so often outweighs the longer term, more “important” things. How do you even think about your legacy when you’re not sure if you can pay this month’s bills?

It’s possible. It requires making a conscious choice. And you can do it. 

Meet Eric Hill. I was fortunate enough to be under Eric’s leadership as part of a team that served in Uganda last fall. There are lots of things that I value and respect about Eric, but none more than the way he loves his three beautiful daughters.

Earlier this year, Eric took the time to write letters of encouragement and affirmation to each of his daughters. They were one page letters which focused on the special character qualities, gifts and abilities in each girl. Each daughter, special in her own unique way. Each one, given a written affirmation of her dad’s love for her and belief in her. Eric used the occasion of a Father/Daughter Dance to present his girls with their letters.

Adeline, Julia, and Lily Claire Hill are three of the most joyful, secure, and delightful young ladies I know. That doesn’t happen by accident. Yes, they have an amazing mother and a strong and supportive extended family. But there’s something about being totally secure in a father’s love that gives unique strength to a child. And what better way for a child to understand the loving, protective and affirming nature of their Heavenly Father than to see it modeled, day to day, by their earthly daddy? 

Men, I urge you to carve out some time this weekend to write letters to your children. If you need help, download a PDF version of Leave Nothing Unsaid  from my web site. It’s easy to follow, and will take you step-by-step through the letter writing process. It will teach you to “speak” the language of affirmation to those you love.

This matters. Today. Your sincere, specific, written encouragement to your children is a priceless gift they will cherish for the rest of their lives. 

Have you ever received a letter like this from your father? What impact has it had on your life?

 

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Comments

I love this, Jody. While my dad didn't leave letters for me, I was definitely secure in his unconditional love. This line resonated with me, "But there’s something about being totally secure in a father’s love that gives unique strength to a child."

I'm thankful to have had an amazing dad who told me often and showed me with his words and his actions that he loved me and affirmed me. But, I can't tell you how much more I would love to have letters from him and be able to read them 26 years later, especially now that I am raising my own kids.

Keep doing what you are doing. It matters. I believe in you and your dream!

Thanks, Tammy! I hope your perspective will inspire dads. So often, it's hard to realize the significance of simple letters like this until it's too late. I continue to pray that the importance of this task will ignite in the hearts of loving dads!

Jody thank you so much for this today. As a father of two teenage boys I have recently become much more aware of the lack of intentional leadership I've been giving to them. This post is one more important reminder for me to be intentional every day in my pouring into them.

Rick, I love that you have had the "ah-ha" about being more intentional with your boys. What better time than when they are teenagers! 

 

I didn't receive special letters like that but received small words of encouragement from my Dad often.  To this day, we disagree on much, but I never question his love for me.  Even now I receive short texts that just say he's proud of me and loves me.  It's definitely helped shape who I am.

Anita, this may sound crazy, but I have a suggestion for you. Would you take a screen shot of some of those text messages from your dad and print them out? Even if he never writes you a letter, you'll cherish having those text messages to look back on. The longer you live, the more they will mean to you.

this is so important! a message every father needs to hear, because it WILL make a difference...so glad you are posting...keep it up!

Had no idea you knew Eric! I echo your sentiments entirely! The Father has used Eric to play such a vital role in my life for a very long time, high school as a matter of fact! Whew! That was a long time ago!

I have never experienced a greater example in my life of godly parenting than from Eric and Kristen both!

Great post Jody!

Thanks, Josh! I love how our stories weave together.  Eric and Kristin are two very special people who have dramatically impacted my life.  Oh, that we could all make such a difference in the lives of others.

Your encouragement is greatly appreciated!